Dear Driver From Hell,
I just wanted to send you a little note letting you know you did not kill me today. Yes, you got close - but you missed. You remember me... that white boy who was walking across the street, in a crosswalk, at a 4-Way Stop, and you decided to step on the gas and aim your piece of crap beat up Jeep Cherokee right at me. Your wife, sister, girlfriend, lover, daughter, grandma, whatever in the passenger seat was yelling at you like you had gone mad. Well.. YOU HAVE! You tried to run me over you sick person. What the hell did I ever do to you? I don't even know you. And since it was dark out I could not read your license plate. You got lucky.
So a big Happy Holidays to you... because you will not be celebrating Christmas this year when Santa comes to your trailer and poops down your chimney... if you have one.
Love,
me.